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I am as guilty in a small way as well. I kissed Judy one time when we were both drinking. Neither of us wanted to stop, but we did. Would I have stopped the next time I kissed her if I had the chance? I just don't know."I felt it was better to remove myself from the temptation for awhile. Anyway, I think she is a wonderful person and is doing a great job caring for her brother. She has enough on her plate without me roiling the waters." Judy might not think that way." I can't help it. Someday I intend to have a conversation with her just to see how she feels if she stays. I will be free in another four months and then we'll both know. I will probably be home for good by that time. I am here for six months." Jonathan, you are one in a million. Another man in your situation would have had her in your bed and damn the consequences. You're better than I am. Look how I seduced Ho Lee." It worked for you, Mom, but you were free to do so. I'm not." I'll hang up now. You know son, this is. " Nope, we are sticking to the plan." She stopped what she was doing and pointed a finger in my face. "I want you to listen to me very closely, Caspian Grey. Don't take this for granted, and don't blow this off. You will give her your best effort when asking her out. You will give her your full attention on your date. And you will give it your best shot. If you hit it off and I am out of the picture, then so be it. You will still be my best friend, and I will still love you. But I need this. I need for you to give 100% to this. Do you understand me?"I didn't answer for a long while. Zoe probably thought I was weighing her statement, but that wasn't it. I don't even think she had noticed, but Zoe had said she loved me. It was like the air was knocked out of my stomach. I was having trouble hearing and the world started to swim."Cas?"Okay, I was quiet too long and she got worried."Sorry. You're right. It wouldn't be fair to this girl to purposefully make the date go bad or anything. I.
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